Homeschooling When it Sucks

I've been doing this for eight years. In case no one ever told you, I'm going to tell you now:

There will be days...

• when the children wiggle non-stop and you can't get their attention without use of force.
• when the desire to organize your tax receipts, clean your tile grout, or finally get to that dentist appointment will seem far more enjoyable than schooling your kids.
• when your children will literally scream at you, "You NEVER help me!!"
• when your children will not stop screaming at one another.
• when you completely agree that public school is really God's answer to ignorance.
• when the baby/toddler just won't nap.
• when other people's agendas will take over your day.
• when you literally CANNOT finish a sentence without correcting someone.
• when four math problems will take two hours.
• when you convince yourself that they can still think clearly with a fever of 101.
• when they just don't get it... for the fifth time.
• when they scowl at you.
  
• when they all ask for your help at once....continually.
• when they refuse to talk to you at all.
• when they tap the dang pencil.
  
• when you discover what they've really been doing while they're supposed to be completing their computer-based curriculum.
• when your husband surpasses your skills in housekeeping, because SOMEONE has to get it done.
• when company asks if they can come in the middle of the school year.
  
• when you get an earful of someone's narrow opinion about your choice to homeschool.
• when you put them in the car for a field trip and they whine because they don't want to go.
• when your expectations are way toooo high.
  
• when your children cry.
• when you cry.
• when you say outloud, "I'm done."

It's not every day, but they do show up. When those days come, know that tomorrow is a new day and God can redeem anything.

The Weekly Task List

I know some of you do this regularly, however, I've never been brave enough to venture far from mom-centric learning methods. Weekly task lists seem to disconnect my children from me and their ability to work independently is questionable many days. Yet, certain events last week got me rethinking how we do this (yet again).

This is our last week before we break for Christmas and it seemed that we had a lot left to accomplish. So rather than rethink it all again I decided to just lay it all out there for the boys. I decided to try the weekly task list.

I wrote out on the whiteboard everything that needed to be finished this week...science ideas, math lessons, vocabulary studies, history thoughts, lapbook, etc.

Then I said, "By Thursday, this board needs to be wiped clean. So, what is your plan to get it there?"

They went to work... BUSILY. They took ownership of everything and we are, indeed, wiping that puppy clean. Cool.

How do you make the weekly task list work for you?

Admiring My Dyslexic Son

Describing my middle son has always been easy for me. He has a good amount of healthy determination. He is a problem solver and loves a physical challenge. When he’s with peers he watches them for a bit and then picks a good one to become friends with. He’s an inventor and a builder. He’s sensitive and compassionate.

And we’ve just figured out that he’s dyslexic.

While I don’t think his dyslexia is severe, it consistently gets in his way: he talked late, he uses nebulous words like “things” and “stuff” when he tries to describe things, spelling is tough, and reading has been a very slow going process.

After reading up on this learning disability I have found out many things about its inner workings. But what’s really been made clear to me is not the severity of my son’s weaknesses but the abundance of his strengths. I’m learning that he relies heavily on context in order to understand meaning. I’m also learning that this applies to more than just words.

He understands his entire world by noting its context. He solves problems by considering the situation he’s in and calling upon his prior knowledge. He chooses friends by first noting their character. He knows how to serve others by picking up on their emotional cues. He can even find all the lost things in our house just by paying close attention to his environment. These traits demonstrate his genius ability to create sense and purpose out of the world in ways that don’t require reading. However, when it does come time to read, he perseveres through it just like any other problem he encounters, by fitting together everything he knows until it all makes sense.

I am amazed at the remarkable strengths this “disability” brings out in him – intuitiveness, creativity, and empathy among them. This new knowledge about my son doesn’t disappoint me in the slightest because I’m confident he has all the skills he’ll need to create a purposeful, productive and fulfilling life in the years ahead. We’ll just cheer him on no matter how long it takes him to get there.

Focus on Special Needs

Heart of the Matter's December online magazine is now out and it's all about special needs. I didn't submit anything for this one (though we're all about special needs here) because there have to be others who go about this task with a lot more wisdom and insight than I do. After reading a little of this issue, I'm finding that I was right.

Have a look at it here!

A Step I am Thankful For

Self-Improvement

You home schooling moms know that doing something just for you is not easy. We put so much into our kids that we put personal aspirations on the back burner or we let ourselves go entirely. Personally, due to fairly recent changes in our life story, I am in a process of becoming myself... that person that I knew God had in mind for me is now actually becoming me.

Therefore, a couple months ago I decided to take step one and get out of this rut of self-deprecation before it ruined me. Three times a week I go to a Tae Bo gym. And good things have come out of it.

1. I get to get out of the house for three hours a week.
2. Instead of constantly giving I get to receive something for an hour.
3. I do not have to be the expert. Someone else teaches me and I'm glad to listen.
4. I do not have to talk (or nag or repeat myself) for an entire hour.
5. My clothes fit much, much better.
6. As a mother of boys I think I should learn well how to punch and kick. :-)
7. When I come home I'm a different mom.
8. A homeschooling mom-friend of mine is now coming with me and she likes it too.

I hope to add more steps to my "me" process. But this works for now.